Setting Boundaries: Reclaim Your Time and Energy for What Matters Most
Today, we’re going to talk about boundaries: from identifying what’s draining you, to setting boundaries, and ultimately figuring out where you can pivot and make some changes. If you have My Dream Life Blueprint Workbook, you can follow along in chapter six. If not, grab a pen and paper so you can take notes.
Off the top of your head, what are some boundaries you know you need to set? The answers I hear from people are often so relatable to one another. We’re all the same. We all need to set similar boundaries, and for whatever reason, we all seem to struggle with them.
I’m going to prompt you with some questions. Take note of how many you answer with a “yes.”
Do you feel overwhelmed with tasks?
Do you have any resentment towards a specific person?
Do you have a tendency to loan things or money to people?
Do you feel unable to say “no” to certain situations?
Do you feel like you’re neglecting yourself and possibly your self-care?
Do you have a random desire to run away from certain responsibilities?
Do you feel like you’re completing tasks with little to no support from others?
Do you feel unable to ask for help sometimes?
Do you try to avoid certain people?
Do you feel like you’re always the one helping, but never being helped?
Do you feel like you’re trying to avoid certain gatherings or interactions with specific people or groups?
Are you feeling burnt out?
Are you having a hard time allowing others to help you?
Understanding what situations or people are potentially taking you or your time for granted is key. These could be related to friends, family, work, or circumstances that are out of your control. Once you’re aware of them, you can take complete control of your time. The first time I ever went through these questions, I answered “yes” to every single one of them. I am a recovering non-boundary setter, and I feel I’m getting better every single day. The amount of improvement I’ve seen is wild, just through understanding, rinsing, and repeating.
By the way, you may want to consider looking inward here as well. You might discover that you spend way too much time complaining, mindlessly scrolling your phone, watching Netflix, etc. Whatever it may be, you might need to set some boundaries with yourself.
I’m going to prompt you with a few more questions to help you understand what’s blocking you and what boundaries you might need to set. This is a super powerful exercise! Don’t overthink your answers; just write down the first thing that comes to mind.
Finish the following sentences:
I feel most drained when…
My biggest stressor right now is…
Someone I need to work on forgiving is…
I can simplify my life by removing…
Someone I need to set boundaries with is…
I feel most calm when I see… (can be a person, thing, situation, etc.)
I feel most relaxed when I do this…
Something I can organize is…
Something I can start saying “no” to…
Picture yourself at your happiest. What do you see?
When I talk to people one-on-one in my DMs, I often hear, “I have to go to my job because I need the money.” Yes, absolutely… but do you have to stay late if your boss requests you to? No. You’re paid for a certain number of hours. If something is not serving you, making you more money, or allowing you to get home to your family or that side hustle you want to build, then you’ve got to start saying “no” to it. That’s what I want you to understand today.
When you realize you can clear up that time and space, it opens up so many new opportunities! What does this free up time for? Where can you refocus this time or energy, and what is now possible for you to do?
When I started to recognize this in my own life, the amount of time, space, energy, and potential that freed up for me blew my mind. I no longer let other people or situations control that time or take my self-worth for granted. I was inspired a thousand times over, and what happened in my life was incredible. With all of that time and energy, I built a company called The Daily Grind.
My hope for you is that you can take something that might be a small passion and turn it into an incredible company that changes people’s lives. Whatever your goal may be, you need to make time and space for yourself and your worth.
Once you think about where you can refocus your energy, what you can shift around, and what you can make happen, share it and declare it. I want to see it in the comments!
コメント